Hidden in the Mist
by PaulieJ
Summary: Ava Eveline Gibbs is a witch that has a very dark past and a uncertain future. Her life is filled with secrets from her youth that followed her into her present. Her secret Lover has been in love with her best friend since the day they met. Will her unrequited love be returned or left one-sided? (I do not own the rights to Harry Potter, but Ava is my own creation!)
1. Prologue

Prologue

I slip in an out of consciousness, my mind completely blank yet at the same time buzzing with excitement. My eyelids heavy with sleep as I lay wrapped in my smooth sheets and heavy comforter. Finally I build up the strength to peek out into my room to find that the early morning fog fills it with darkness that I welcome so graciously with open arms.

I use my weak and sleep-ridden limbs to heave myself up into a sitting position. My neck rolls letting the loud cracking of my weakened bones penetrate the walls around me while I stretch myself across the hard mattress and relish in the pleasure the sensations bring.

As I stretch my toes, I stare into the thick darkness that envelopes me and let my eyes adjust until I can make out the outline of my packed trunk and snowy owl, Mona, who lies asleep in her cage. My ears perk up soon after my eyes and begin to search in the silence for any signs of life. The old manor is eerily silent as always but my sensitive ears pick up the sound of small feet padding silently down the hall.

I jump out of bed with the grace of a dancer and the fluid yet silent movements of a tiger— being born into darkness pays off—I grab my night robe off my dresser and hurry towards the towering bookcases that cover my walls. The padding feet grow closer while I instinctively find the copy of Dracula in my muggle written section and pull. The book-case swings open silently and I step inside, closing it behind my back.

I stand there in the darkness for no less than a second before I hear the click of the lock on my bedroom door, and I'm racing swiftly and silently down the hidden staircase. My blood is rushing and I can feel it pulsing underneath my pale skin, heart racing I come to a sudden stop and wait for a few seconds, listening. The padding is far above me now in the Manor, it makes me cringe knowing the house elf is in my room.

Igron has been in the families' service for as long as I can remember and even longer before that, I wonder why father never gave me a straight answer about why we kept him around. All I know is he sent chills down my spine, with his large, sullen cataract filled eyes and gray patchy skin that sags in all the wrong places. The only coverage is the thin moth-eaten sack that covers his pencil thin body, given to him by his previous master when he was released from service—or so I am told.

I clear my thoughts of all nastiness and secrecy so I can focus on pulling on my robe to cover my thin nightdress. I can already feel the chill of the countryside's air rushing up my hidden staircase so I know I'm getting closer to my escape. Even with the little coverage from the cold I already feel a little more at peace knowing I'm almost out of the house.

I move down the winding staircase before I come to a complete halt in front of the door that leads to the outside world. I step tentatively towards its placing my hand on the cold metal of the handle, twisting and pulling ever so slightly as not to let it creak. I count in my head, "5…4…3...2…1," and I'm outside.

I pull the door shut and I step under the dull moonlight that still streams through the morning fog. I remember the day I discovered the secret staircase as I enjoy the chill of the morning and the moist ground under my small, bare feet.

I remember how when I was 7, my cousin Lucius chased me around the Manor with his wand, yelling that he was going to curse me if he caught me. Instinctively I ran to my bedroom, but to my dismay I realized that there was no way but the window to escape his grasps. I grabbed the nearest thing to use as a weapon, although I knew if his threats came true the bloody book that was now in my grasp would not help me. That is when it happened, the bookcase opened to reveal the hidden staircase and with not much time left I ran inside and closed myself in my new hiding place.

Now here I stood, not wasting any more time I pull my dress above my ankles and begin to run through the manors garden.

I push the bookcase open just a crack and listen for any movement—nothing. I move into my room and shut the bookcase only to find my bed made and my clothes lying out onto the freshly smoothed comforter. From the small alarm clock on my dresser I read it is now 8:00, which means I am just in time to get ready and leave so I can catch my train to Hogwarts.

I know that downstairs my parents are now sitting at the long table in the dining hall, as far away from one another as possible; being served some of the finest eggs money can buy in London while they stare at each other with disgust in their cold gray-blue eyes. I have no intentions of joining the silent and awkward breakfast.

I look down with disdain at the outfit, presumably picked out by my mother that lies clean and wrinkle-free on my bed. It is a white button-up long-sleeved collar shirt, with long black pants that would make my curve less legs look even more straight and unshaped. As an eleven year old I understood my body had a lot of maturing to look forward to, so I open the door to my closet and step inside walking around the room until I find what I am looking for.

I step in front of my body length mirror to admire my reflection. I'm pleased with my choices; I switched out the plain button up for a thin long sleeve black sweater that covers all the way up to my neck. The black pants which did nothing for my shape were replaced with a high-water pleated, black skirt that went mid-thigh on top of sheer black stockings.

I like the way the black makes my skin look so pale and how my auburn hair frames my face in natural curls. I'm so different from my parents, but the thing that sets me so apart from them are my eyes; compared to their cold gray-blue ones my deep green ones are so alive with life and vibrancy. I step into my Mary Jane's and twirl around in front of my reflection.

I exit my closet when my bedroom door opens suddenly. I'm taken by surprise when Lucius appears from out behind it. His eyes find me and take me in as though drinking in my appearance, his eyes linger a bit longer then I feel comfortable with before I cough. His gray eyes bore into mine as he sneers at me, "Hurry up, we are going to be late because of you, Auntie and Uncle will not be pleased if we miss the train and they are stuck with you for another year."

My head turns to check the clock while I keep him in my peripheral view, it is now 9:00, "how could I have lost so much time," I wonder to myself. I look back at him, again his eyes where they shouldn't be. "I need help with my trunk and owl, if you hadn't noticed I cannot lug it down myself," I shoot back. " Hmm… Fine I'll get Igron, you run down stairs and meet Auntie and Uncle in the town car." I grab my small hand back and push past him but I'm not fast enough because he catches me by the waist. The feeling of his hot breath on my neck makes me want to vomit.

"I promised Auntie and Uncle I'd watch over you at Hogwarts," his hand slides lower and I freeze, I can't breathe and he chuckles, "Don't worry I plan on keeping that promise." I shove my elbow into his stomach, not hard enough to do damage, but enough to make him let go so I can run. I move as fast as possible down the hall but I can still feel his eyes on me when I finally reach the main staircase at the end of the hall.

We pushed past the barrier onto platform nine and three-quarters just in time to catch the Hogwarts express. I breathed in the fumes of the engines and my eyes devour the sight of the train that would finally take me far, far away from the manor house, if not only for a school year. Wizarding families push past me waving to their children now seated on the train. Just before I step onto the train I hear my father's bored drawl call me, "Ava, come here now."

I turn and move swiftly toward my parents, Lucius was already with the rest of the Slytherin 5th years and my luggage is packed on to the train. My mother Evana looks at me, her eyes displaying something I had never seen before—pride. She places her arms loosely around me, her cheek barely touching mine and gives me her best attempt at an awkward hug. After what seems like a second she lets go and steps back, her pride being replaced by what I actually do recognize disapproval of my outfit.

My father, Arius pats my shoulder and says, "Lucius will be looking after you as promised. Don't bother writing unless absolutely urgent, and we will be sending something close to a—gift; when we receive news that you are sorted into Slytherin of course. If not, then we will meet you at the station when the year is up. Here," he hands me a bag of money, "that should get you through the year so spend it wisely. Now hurry we can't afford you missing your train."

With his last word I turn and sprint onto the train as the Whistle blows. I turn around and the last view of my parents is their backs vanishing through the barrier as the train begins to move forward. I move up the train in search of an empty compartment, but nothing.

I'm walking faster as I come across a commotion in one compartment with a skinny, greasy-haired boy already in his robes, a red-haired girl with green eyes like mine, and two boys that strike me as trouble. One boy I recognize as a Black descendant Sirius; the other I was not quite sure about but if my instincts were correct he was a Potter, the family my parents found very unworthy of being purebloods, James their son was now was sitting before my eyes.

I keep myself in earshot but out of sight and listen to their conversation. From what I can make out the two boys have not taken a liking to the greasy-haired boy, whose voice strikes me as cunning and rude. But the red-head girl is in his defense; when I step into view and slide open the compartment door. All conversation stops and eyes fall on me.

I look at Potter and Black my words directed at them, "What do you think you are doing?" I sneer at them. Their confused looks fill me with a sense of accomplishment, "This is our compartment," I say pointing to the greasy-haired boy and the red-haired girl who haven't seem to catch on yet, "well what are you waiting for? Get out before I make you." I say as calmly as possible.

Potter's attention is now directed at the red-head but Sirius keeps his gaze on me, he only looks away when he realizes he is staring. "Is this true?" Potter says to the red head. She looks at me a bit stunned, then back at Potter and stammers, "Ye-yes it is, so listen to her," she pauses before she realizes she's hurt Potter's feelings, "please."

"Fine, but were not done with you Snivilous!" Potter barks as he shoves past my shoulder, Sirius is close behind him. Sirius' gaze is on the floor as he says quietly to me, "sorry." Then he's gone after Potter.

I smirk, feeling brilliant and move into the compartment. I lie across the seats that seconds ago had been filled by Sirius and Potter. I look at the greasy-haired boy and red haired girl, who seem to still be in shock, but the greasy haired boy gains back his composure and snarls at me, "Who do you think you are? I could have handled that."

"Oh really? Would you like me to call the twits back?" with my reference of Potter and Sirius as twits the greasy-haired boy seems to find some common ground with me. "I didn't mean to eavesdrop, okay. But I heard what was going on from outside and it just so happened I needed a place to sit. You could thank me now or later but I'd like to start with introductions if you don't mind?"

The red-head girl addresses me, "Sorry, don't mind him, Severus is quite stubborn. Thank you for helping us earlier, my name is Lily, Lily Evans, and this is Severus Snape."

We push into the great hall; the new-found bond between the three of us is already as thick as blood. I walk forward bravely my eyes never leaving the back of Professor Dumbledore leading us to the center of all the houses' attention. When we finally come to a halt, Severus slouches next to me while lily fidgets with her robes nervously.

The Stool is placed in front of us all and suddenly the hall goes silent when Professor Dumbledore places the hat on the top of the stool and unrolls the list of names of all the first years. We stand there breathlessly as the names are called.

Each time a person was the table where the house sits erupts in loud hooting and clapping, it strikes me as rather annoying. Finally after ages my name is called, "Gibbs, Ava!" I walk forward calmly and place the sorting hat on my head. Its clever voice whispers in my ear, "Oooh a Gibbs… Interesting, very interesting. So many Slytherins in your family lineage, dark wizards and witches they are." I cringe, "I see cunningness and wit, very clever yes, but something…yes something is different. Hmmm, better be—," the last word is shouted for the hall to hear, "GRYFFINDOR!"

My heart stops as I take off the Sorting hat and place it back on the stool, the Gryffindor house table erupts into applause and I walk smoothly over. I don't let my true feelings penetrate the smile that is plastered on my face as I slip next to Lily. She hugs me so tightly for a second I forget my fears and hug back. Then she let's go and the ceremony continues, all that is left on my mind is the thought of my parent's disappointment.

I smile genuinely and think to myself, "I'm so disowned."


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

6th year

Music echoes loudly throughout the Gryffindor common room as I snuggle on a window seat, my legs wrapped close to me, I have my book _Deadly Curses, Poisons, and Potions: How to Curse your Enemies_ tucked safely in my arms. The large clock above the hearth reads 9:00 when I feel his presence next to me, only to be confirmed when I see dark curls out of the corner of my eye.

"What?" I snap not bothering to look up.

"It's nice to see you to Ava, what is that rubbish you're reading?" He grabs my book from my grasp before I have a chance to protest. Finally I look up at him as he studies the cover, I take in his dark chocolate eyes that are set in his chiseled and charming face, surrounded by his obsidian messy curls.

_For a complete git he is quite handsome…_

"Give it here Sirius, I don't have time to waste nor would I like to waste it on you," I smirk quite pleased, he stares deep into my eyes. His usual charms to hypnotize poor unsuspecting girls have no effect on me, I grab my book and push past him.

"I like…" he starts but quickly realizes his guard is down, "I mean you're different from the others—girls I mean."

"I'm not like any girl you will ever meet Sirius." I smirk. I trot away on light feet. I'm walking I begin to pass by my best friend Lily and her twit for a boyfriend—James Potter. I draw nearer and catch small parts of their conversation:

"I can't believe your still friends with that...Witch. What's her name? Ali? Oh right… Ava," James says addressing the group but directing the comment at Lily.

"James! Stop, she's my friend and she's been nothing but accepting of our relationship!" Lily says in my defense. I slow my speed trying to catch every word. "_Accepting?_ Bloody hell if calling me a git and trying to curse me is accepting then we must have two different definitions of the word. Plus she still hangs around that little rat Snivilous." He receives a chorus of approval from the pack surround the couple.

With this last word I'm behind him and Lily grows silent. I grab the Pumpkin Juice on the table behind James and dump it on his thick head. He gasps and jumps about ten feet into the air. He spins around and glares at me, his hand twitches towards his wand but I already have mine out and directed at his throat.

"Severus Snape is more of a man then you will ever be Potter. Next time you want to say something about me, say it to my face, not your little gang of Marauders. Thanks Lily," my last words come off more sarcastic than intended and I stalk off. I hear Lily call after me while Potter whines about just having washed his hair, I laugh wickedly.

I wander down the corridors of the castle rolling that night's events over in my head. I feel a twinge of guilt for brushing Lily off like that, but James deserved ever word I shot at him like a curse. My wand illuminates the path in front of me and my ears perk up; I search for any other noises besides my soft breathing.

I finally reach the astronomy tower and it's almost 10:00, our desired meeting time. I sit down on one of the steps and mumble the counter-spell to turn off the light that spills from the end of my wand; darkness replaces the once illuminated space. The only light is the soft moonlight that spills in from the large glass windows. Even if he doesn't realize it, it all seems so—_perfect_.

"Boo," from out behind me, as silent as a ghost I recognize his leering voice. I spin to face him; his smirk I know so well is set in his stony featured face. "Soooo scary Severus," I shoot playfully at him, my limbs melt under the stare of his onyx eyes and he chuckles. _He is completely oblivious…_

"How's Lily?" he tries to hide the longing and guilt in his eyes but I still catch it and my eyes fall to the ground. Now I cannot hide my guilt, "What? What's happened?" I catch something in his voice—_concern maybe?_

"Well," I pause looking up from under my lashes, "earlier I may have…Poured pumpkin juice over Potter's head after he told Lily I was a—'witch' and called you Snivilous." Now I look at him, unsure of how he will react to my defensive actions on both his and my account.

He doesn't seem at all shocked, but his disgust at the mention of Potter is soon replaced by amusement. "I wouldn't expect anything less from you; don't look at me like that and try to pretend you're so innocent," he taps my forehead with his index finger and I think I'm going to collapse with laughter when he says, "you and I both know you're not."

We continue like this for hours. We chat and laugh and every now and then we stare silently into the night sky. Finally I turn to him and drink in his presence next to me. My mind spins; I feel my stomach flutter like it usually does when I spend time close to him.

I have known for a while that I've fallen in love with Severus Snape, but I'm prepared to go my whole life without speaking a word of it to anyone else, especially not him. Who knows what goes on in his head, although I know most of it I'm sure there are things that he locks tightly in there for no one else to discover.

I see his gaze flit towards me when he realizes I'm starring and I turn my eyes back towards the window. I hope I haven't been staring for too long, sometimes I just get lost in thought. Now he's starring at me, "What are_ you_ looking at?" I say smoothly. I hide my nervousness with a giggle, it comes out to girly and I cough so it doesn't make it awkward.

"Does Lily hate me still?" I look at him shocked; I can see the longing and guilt back in his hard gaze. "I…"I look at him quizzically; my mind transports me back to last year on the day of the 'incident'.

The image of the marauders standing around Potter while he makes Severus hang in mid-air makes me tear my gaze away from his. Then it all happens so fast, Severus is back on the ground and Lily is there to help him. His cruel words leave her taken aback and then she's crying and running into Potters arms. That was the day that Lily left our little pack of misfits, the day I became the only tie between the two, the day I lost one of my best friends to the clutches of the Marauders.

I stare back at him, "No, but why do you care so much about her? We've already lost her to the Marauders. I wouldn't be surprised if she ends up…" I don't finish instead I find myself staring into the cold and angry face of Severus. His eyes don't hold longing anymore, just hatred and sadness. He looks away from me and I let my mind get the better of me.

I think back to the way Severus would look at Lily when he thought no one was watching him. Severus would have—would still do anything for Lily and all he seems to want to do is mend their friendship.

_Or is it?_

I remember back to how much Severus' hatred grew for Potter the day that she chose that git over him. At the time I had passed it off as common sense but know that I go over it in my mind I realize it is something more—_something deeper._

"_No—,"_ I accidentally say out loud, but it's too late and Severus turns to me. "What?" He snaps before he realizes who he is talking too and relaxes his feature. I look away from him, he doesn't have to say anything else my suspicions have been confirmed. "You're in—_Love_ with her." I don't mean it as a question and he stares at me dumbfounded.

"How—," He starts but I cut him off before he can say anything else. "Goodnight Severus. I'll see you on the train tomorrow…Hopefully." With my last word I get up and he grabs my arm, "but, why are you leaving?" I bend down at level with his eyes, I take a deep breath realizing the deep risk I am taking, and place my lips softly on his.

To my surprise he does not protest or push me away, instead after the surprise wears off he lays his hand on my blushing cheek and his thin lips mold with mine. After what seems like ages I release from his grasp. "That's why." I say before I stalk off down the tower stairs leaving him in shock.


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I lay on my bed with my head buried into a pillow, swirling around thoughts and emotions that could never be expressed properly to another person. All my attention focuses on my thoughts, thoughts that leave my belly churning and heart racing.

The same memory keeps replaying before my eyes like a broken record, the day on the train coming back home. How I had spent the ride tucked away in a compartment, my nose in a book when the door finally slid open. He had lifted my legs to sit underneath them and played with my stockings.

We didn't say a word to each other. Every so often I would look at him from behind my book only to look away when he would try to say something. When finally we arrived at the station he grabbed my book and helped me carry my stuff to where my driver was waiting. That's when he was gone.

The pounding in my chest runs in tune with all the other noises of my surroundings. The steady_ ticking_ of the clock high on my wall, the muffled voices coming from the floor below, the soft _clinking_ on my window—

I stop and my thoughts come to a halt; I lift myself up, listening. The dull _clinking_ against the glass of my window is barely audible, but it's there. Struggling I host myself onto my feet and make my way over to the window seat.

Reaching for the clasp I push the window open and stare in the darkness when a pebble flies past my peripheral view. My eyes search the garden for the source of the thrown pebble when my gaze stops on a dark figure lost in the shadows of a dying elm tree. It's cloaked in all black and I can make out the slight slouch of its back, I recognize the figure at once—_Severus_.

My heart begins to pound again and I continue to stare awkwardly not wanting to believing my eyes when he steps out of the shadows and into a thin beam of moonlight. The light reflects off his black hair and his identity is confirmed—not that I had any doubt it was him. I know that slouch immediately.

His index finger flicks towards me and then back toward him, beckoning me to come down from my room. I shake my head at him stubbornly and cross my arms letting my emotions get the best of me. He motions for me to come down again and finally I give in.

He moves back into the shadows while I pull the window shut and scurry around my room frantically. I find myself in front of my mirror pulling my hair out of its bun and running my fingers through its disheveled state. I pat down my crinkled tank top and straighten my sweats as I pull my cloak around me and stuff my wand into my boot. I look around the room, my eyes stop on the pile of unfinished and unopened letters to and from Severus, a pang of guilt runs up my spine.

Finally ready I listen to the rest of the house all wrapped up in their own little lives and reach for my copy of Dracula. The secret staircase slides open, I step inside hurriedly. Quickly and quietly I move down the stairs eager to make it outside but at the same time dreading the possibilities of what may happen.

I pull my wand out of my boot and push the door open; timidly I step outside and cast myself into the shadows. "_Two can play at that game."_ I think to myself as I spot his dark cloak still under the elm. His dark onyx eyes gleam at the place where I'm hiding and I know there is no point but I always enjoy the game.

He takes a step out of the protection of the tree and towards me, carefully anticipating my next move. I'm still in the shadows but I move silently behind an old and rusted statue, his footsteps are silent but his breathing grows nearer. Closer and closer he comes, measuring his distance and the time he has before I make my next more, but I keep waiting for him to come nearer.

Finally he is behind the statue, peering through the darkness trying to find me. I take a deep breath, keeping the exact destination I want to go pictured in mind and—_Pop._

He whips around and finds me, merely inches away from his face, grinning at him cleverly. "I win," I whisper breathlessly. He stares at me, mesmerized by my features, whether it is because he merely missed me or he had forgotten what I looked like, I don't know. "I—," he starts but I cut him off before he can say anything else.

"Shhh," I whisper with a finger to his lips, I point towards the house signaling that I don't want us found out. He understands and he grabs my hands closing his eyes as I do too. With a small _Pop _were gone from the back garden.

* * *

I recognize the place he brings me too, it's the tree he once told me about, the one he used to visit with lily as a child. I pull my cloak tighter around me as a wolf howls in the distance. I stare up at the night sky and see the stars and half-moon shinning down on the clearing—_Perfect._

I feel his eyes piercing my back so I finally turn around and face him, his face stone like but his eyes soft, "Bloody fucking hell! What were—what are you thinking? You could have been caught or we could have been caught!" I pause and stare at him my voice angry but I know my face betraying my true emotions with my burning cheeks.

He crosses his arms, "Do you think they really would have cared?" his voice bored and I falter. I know they wouldn't have cared, I could stay out for days and they wouldn't notice I was gone.

"Still," I hesitate, "if father would have…" he stares and replies, "I could have handled it and I still would have taken you with me."

I blush, my cheeks as red as my hair now and hide my face. He grabs my chin and makes me face him, "Now why would you do that." His long fingers push a strand of hair behind my ear and I tremble, partly from the cold and the other from the sexual frustration and attraction radiating between us.

I grunt with frustration and pull away from him, "Damn you," I whisper a little too loud. I stride over to the base of the tree and plunk myself down on a large, exposed root. He is right behind me when he motions to the space to my left, "Do you mind if I—," "Go ahead," I finish. He sits down and I start on him again, this time apologetically.

"I'm sorry… I should have written back…I should have read your letters. It's not that I didn't have anything to say, it was I didn't know what to say. I wasn't sure why you were writing me, I mean with the way we had left things I was sure you had nothing to say to me—," his finger falls onto my lips silencing me with his piercing stare.

"Ava stop," he begins but I interrupt, "but—." "Wait. I know. Don't apologize it is partly my fault that you felt that way and I am sorry. I have a lot of explaining to do and please hold your questions till the end because I would like to get my point across." He looks at me his expression blank and I nod silently. "Good."

"I've loved Lily from the beginning—," I stop him and say, "Do you really think I—,"

"I'm not finished." He replies tenderly and I stare at him waiting for him to go on. He continues, describing how he was drawn to her and how he feels the need to protect her. With every passing moment the sorrow behind his words reflects in his dark eyes. I'm left sitting in silence as he continues about his hatred for James Potter and the Marauders.

Finally he pauses to look at me searching my face for some type of emotional response, but my face is stone hard and blank. On the inside I'm breaking, instead of pushing me away his words made me fall even deeper in love with him. My only regret is that with all the devotion and unrequited love he has for Lily Evans, I'm left in his same position.


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

He grows silent, his jaw tight as he stares at me with soul-searching eyes. For the first time I see myself and what I represent. Here in this moment I am open. I am weak. I am lost. I am a girl again. I am the 11 year old girl standing in front of her bedroom mirror waiting for her boobs to mature like her mentality. Waiting for someone to reach inside her mind and find that she is broken, far beyond repair.

And in this moment with a wide variety of emotions coursing through my veins that cannot be deciphered, my one purpose is to care for the young man sitting side by side with me.

I fling my arms around his neck, unexpectedly pulling us into a tight embrace and I feel closer to him then I've ever felt before. To my surprise he only hesitates slightly before his arms slide around my waist as though not to break or frighten me.

"We have come a long way haven't we?" he mumbles through a knit of curls in his face.

"Just think we have one more year to go before we are both free— well partially." I sigh.

I unwrap myself from him and for the first time in years— I breathe. He looks at me again mesmerized and I falter, perplexed but I push it away and focus on the night that envelopes us.

"We still have a long way to go…" speaking to the sky, unsure of whether I mean our future or revealing my story to him.

"Why here?"

He stares at me unsure how to answer. Shifting slightly he shrugs his shoulders, his face becoming unreadable.

"It's beautiful," out of the corner of my eye I see his gaze shift slightly to me. I stand up pretending not to notice while I ruffle my hair and yawn slightly.

"You're tired," He says smugly.

"I'm never tired." I shoot back playfully, stifling another yawn.

"You're a bloody liar," standing up he grabs my hand, "I've kept you long enough, it's time I take you home."

"Home? What home—," I falter, shocks trickling through my body from his sudden bold connection.

I guess I was staring at our hands interlocked for too long when he grunts. Realizing I pull myself back into reality. _It can't be what I think. _With my last thought his stone lips curl into a smirk and I know he's either listening or I'm blushing.

_I'll show you something to smirk about._ I let go of his hand and before he can resist, my arms are wrapped around his waist.

_Pop._ Were gone

* * *

"Goodnight," I whisper, watching him disappear into the shadows from behind my bedroom window.

The clock reads 3:00 am. I stand alone in the dark the rest of the house dreaming wicked things while I replay images of the evening's events; like a muggle record replaying.

In front of the mirror again, just like the few short hours before I met the two people that changed my life forever, I see something different. This time it's not an awkward little girl starring back. The person that stands before me can no longer be labeled as a little girl, with her full figure, haunting eyes, and cunning attitude. She is going to do great things_, yes something is different._

I move around the room. Shuffling tiredly past my desk I let my hands run over the smooth parchment of his unopened letters. How many hours he must have spent thinking of what to say to convey what he was feeling—both of us so confused. I can feel the guilt lessen in my stomach but with tonight's events I still feel I should have picked up my quill… I should have stopped being a bloody baby.

_He is right, I'm tired._ I throw my cloak onto the ground and climb into bed, my wand tucked under my pillow. The sheets, warm and inviting, lull me into a deep, undisturbed sleep. A pleasant change from the usual nightmares.


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

It's funny how much a person can change overnight. A whole attitude towards life and the people in it can change in a blink of an eye. At least that's how I looked at it when I arrived back at Hogwarts. Throughout the first months we had come back I no longer roamed the corridor and common room with my robes pulled tight and head down. I walked with the grace I had achieved in childhood and flaunted with as much modesty as possible the many things that I had not had when I was eleven.

Of course the shyness did stray back from time to time—mostly in the company of my best friend, Severus Snape. We would spend hours alone together studying, talking, and all together enjoying the company that no one else could provide us with. Severus still stuck in his ways prowled around the school like he was about to be attacked by a predator, or worse as if he was ready to attack.

He had good reason too of course. The Marauders never really did give in on tormenting him, but they did lighten the hostility after Potter saved Severus's life. After it happened he came straight to me. We were meeting in our normal spot when he came rushing up the stairs…

"What's wrong? What's happened? You look like you've seen a vampire," I took in his frazzled appearance, torn robs, flushed face, heavy panting.

His eyes bore into mine before he grabs my hand, pulling me into the broom cupboard next to us.

"Lupin. Werewolf." He stares at me matter of fact.

"What? I think I need to take you to Madam Pomfrey, you're speaking udder nonsense."

As I begin to pull him back he stops me, blocking my exit.

"No, I'm serious. Look at me I would never make this up, not to you," I look at him perplexed, his words turn cold and smooth he grabs my face, "you have to believe me Ava, I followed them to the Womping Willow. There's some kind of entrance to a secret room. They were all there. Sirius had led me there, told me how to get in."

"I don't understand? They were all there? How? Someone would have noticed and he's a WEREWOLF. All of them would have gotten themselves killed."

"Remember in Transfiguration when we learned about an Animagus."

"Yes, a witch or wizard who can morph themselves into an animal at will."

"Exactly." He stares at me like I've figured it all out.

"But only very powerful, skilled wizards and witches are able to transform into Animagi. It took me… I mean how could a couple of twats like the marauders figure it out?"

Then it struck us both. "Dumbledore!"

"That's why no one has noticed, they're under the protection of the Headmaster. He provided the room and he taught them how to transform so they could all be with Lupin," He stares at me with pride, having finally figured it all out all he needed was for me to fill in the gaps.

"But wait…? What? You followed them! Bloody fucking hell! You could have been killed! KILLED! How are you not dead? What happened! How are you still alive?" I was hitting him now, on the verge of tears, anger and worry swirling through my body. I stop and back away to calm down when his face turns to stone.

"Potter. He… pulled me out of there before Lupin got to do any serious damage," He sat down, his face in his hands.

"He saved you?" I paused.

"No! He was just saving his own ass. Sirius led me to my grave; he was ready to let me die." His eyes found mine, cold and full of hatred. Finally calm I went to sit next to him. Grabbing his hand I looked into his eyes.

"You're safe. I don't care about anything else. The last thing I want to lose is my best friend. By the way you're also a bloody idiot," I say about to smack him over the head, instead he turns and catches my hand. His eyes are back on mine, this time soft and filled with care.

I reach towards his face, "wow Severus… your face is filled with an actual emotion, you aren't stone anymore," I laugh and he distorts his face back into a cold stare before breaking under my laughing with a slight grin.

* * *

From there things moved smoothly. Sirius continued to glare at Severus as we walked each other from or to class. The first confrontation sent me off the edge.

I was in the common room, lounging on one of the sofas by the hearth. I didn't speak to any other seventh year. I just sat there and enjoyed the little time to myself before I went to meet Severus. That's when he showed up. He picked up my legs and plopped himself underneath them like no one's business.

"Excuse me?" I stare at him coldly.

"You're excused love." He replied coolly, batting his eyelashes and puffing out his chest like a girl would do. I sit there baffled. _Who the hell does he think he is…_

"I was just admiring you from over there," here leisurely points at a group of jealous looking sixth years who obviously wanted his attention more than I did, "I guess I didn't do a good job of getting rid of Snivilous, I don't have you all to myself yet.

"No sorry I'm not your 'love'," I remove my legs from his lap and stand up, "and I meant leave me alone you twat. I should go to Dumbledore for what you did…" I say lowering my voice into a growl.

"Oh so he did tell you? Fine, why didn't you? Go protect your little greasy boyfriend."

"He is not my boyfriend."

"Then you're available," he gets up and puts his hands on my shoulder, "why don't you go with me to Hogsmeade this weekend, we can get butter beer and maybe I'll even give you a little kiss. Huh what d'you say?"

"I have a big fat no for you; I wouldn't go out with a pretentious git like you if it meant I'd have to kiss a banshee instead. You're fuller of yourself then I imagined. Go to bloody hell." I stalk off, leaving him to sulk behind me. He'd return to the sixth years in a matter of seconds, while I had someone more important to share my company with.

* * *

"He's a git a bloody git. A complete and utter arse!" I pace the bottom of the steps as Severus watches from a few steps above, "he has no shame whatsoever, he even had the audacity to ask for a snog!"

"He what…" Severus stood up but quickly walked down to where I was pacing and steadied me, "you are not realizing this now…he really asked for a snog?"

"Yes!" I thought about telling him about the boyfriend part, _how would he react?_

"He called me your boyfriend, really?" he smirked slightly.

"Severus! You know that isn't fair!" I got to sit down defeated.

"Just a habit, sorry." He looks at me almost ashamed.

"A habit," I let that sink into my brain and start to chuckle, "oh god no."

"I find your fantasies fascinating; do you think you like to be on top because you find the power of dominance stimulating?" He laughs at me.

"Oh no no no no..dear lord why?" I sink into my palms, my cheeks burning bright as tomatoes.

"I didn't say anything was wrong with that?" his hands clasped between his knees as I peek out from the side of my hands. He's staring at me with a large mix of amusement and interest.

"We will never speak of this again." It's bad enough that I have to handle him longing after Lily, now I have to shield my thoughts so I don't have to face awkward questions about my feelings for him.

I can see straight into her memories, her pain, and her… love for me. It had been sometime since I realized my feelings for Ava had developed into more than just a friendship. I care for her as a best friend, but I love her as something more. I would always love Lily, but I realized just like she had its time for me to move on.

"About lily…"

"Oh god Severus get out of my head please!" she sinks lower into herself.

"Lily is the past Ava, I still care about her, but I am not in love with her." She stares at me in disbelief.

"It's time I moved on with my life, I realize I have plans for myself now. I mean for a career and finishing up here at Hogwarts."

"Yes, I understand Severus." Her eyes soften as her lips curl up into a smile.

"So about those thoughts of yours…" I lower my face to hers, my hand caressing her cheek; I softly place my lips on hers. We mold together and I can feel her pulse quicken when I pull away.

"Don't stop," she whispers…


End file.
